All posts by Gina Kleinmartin

The Seventh Day of Christmas: Seven Swans a-Swimming

 

The other day, I was driving our son through a nice Christmas snow so he could volunteer at the museum, and he said, ‘you know, mom, everything is pretty with snow on it.’

I agreed. The world is so beautiful when covered with snow. And I have to think that the last bird mentioned in the twelve days of Christmas is the most beautiful of them all. And I want to be reminded to look for the beauty that surrounds us, like in the snow.

It could be easy to look at the snow and only see needing to shovel it or how hard it is to drive in it. But it also makes everything look so pretty, and it makes the world glow. It’s such a common thing, and it’s everywhere, but it is beautiful.

We have a pair of cardinals that like to sit in the tree outside our window. The male is such a vivid color, especially against the snow and the bark of the bare tree. The female is the same shape and just as graceful, just s beautiful. Together they will make another generation of cardinals that will flit in the tree in years to come. I don’t know how many generations I have already watched.

We have old windows, and on nights when it is cold and damp enough, we can wake up to feathers of frost blooming on them. I dread ever getting new windows because they don’t have that little bit of beauty anymore.

When my mother was living with us before she died, she had a teddy bear she loved dearly. She was so beautiful when cuddling it.

Every where we turn, our lives are surrounded by beauty. If we define beauty too narrowly, however, we will miss it. Defining it broadly— sun glinting off ice, a brown bird with the promise of more, an old woman’s smile— and our lives are full of beauty.

And the world certainly needs more of it.

So when I remember the swans-a-swimming, I will think of beauty and try to remember to look for it everywhere, even where I don’t expect to find it.

Back to introduction.
Forward to Eight.

The Sixth Day of Christmas: Six Geese a-Laying

 

My mother would tell me a story of how the Romans used geese instead of dogs to guard their cities and soldiers. I am not sure how widespread through out Rome this actually was, but there is historical evidence that the Romans and many many others have relied on these birds to sounds an alarm and defend them or their property from intruders. So on this sixth day of Christmas, I am thinking about defense.

I am thinking about the defenses we set up that actually hurt us, the ones that our animal brains put into place to deal with hurts when we don’t have the tools to deal with them in a healthy manner. You probably can name a couple of your own right now, and know exactly what I mean. I have been under a great deal of stress over the past few years, and have learned some needed but not healthy ways of defending my psyche. Now that the stress is loosening up, I need to remember to shift from non productive defenses to productive ones.

For example, I have a procrastinator’s habit of doing busy work: when you keep moving and get things done but they are not the things that will actually move your life forward. Yes, the refrigerator needs to be cleaned and dinner needs to be cooked, but that looming bill needs to be paid and that dreadful task needs to be done as well. But by busying myself with other tasks, I can keep pushing off what needs to be done, working hard, and still feeling guilt, stress and not moving forward.

So when I hear this line, I will think of defenses that are good and ones that are dangerous and will remember to work against the ones that will not help me in the long run, even if they make me feel better in the short run.

Back to introduction.
Forward to Seven.

The Fifth Day of Christmas: Five Golden Rings

Eddie Izzard jokes that at any Christmas party, when people hear this part of this carol, they run into the room to sing it.

An additional funny thing is that it’s so out of place. The first few days are gifts of birds, here’s a sensible if overkill gift of the only jewelry in the song, and then we are back to two more birds. I had a personal a-ha! Moment when I learned that ‘gold rings’ could be a variation on ‘gold spinks’ (an old name for goldfinch). While the first printed version of the song we have has five finger rings in the illustration, that doesn’t mean that the mistake didn’t date to 1780. Logically, it doesn’t fit to have the rings in the middle of the birds, to me. So, for the fifth day of Christmas, I will be thinking about change and mistakes.

It’s easy to be scared of change and mistakes. It leads to the unknown and out of our comfort zones, and it’s frightening to be somewhere we don’t know well. Even if the place we’re used to is miserable. But change can lead to growth and a chance to move forward and into a better and happier comfort zone. And mistakes are a chance to refine and move forward. I try to remember that mistakes are proof of risk, and without risk there is no chance of reward.

In our house, we have a wonderful desk my husband make over 20 years ago. It has a drop down leaf, so we’d always have clean desk space, no matter how messy the desk got.  The first time he cut the leaf, he cut it just a bit too small. Since then, the mistake he had made has been used to create larger table space for parties, a top to the rabbit hutch and it’s currently a support for our Christmas tree. We still call it ‘the mistake’ and agree it’s been an incredibly useful mistake over the years.

So, on this fifth day of Christmas, I will remember that mistakes aren’t bad by definition, only when you allow them to be so.

Back to introduction.
Forward to Six.